Tuesday, January 5, 2010


I must confess that at this onset of the new year and decade, I can't seem to muster much enthusiasm for my job. I have this urge to do something on my own, to work independently instead of doing the conventional, although I am not quite sure exactly what that means.

So I've been praying about this. Now, when you tell people you are praying for something, or wishing for something, a common response is, "be careful what you pray (wish) for because you just might get it," meaning yes you may get more than you bargained for, or get something that has a Twilight Zone ironic twist to it.

I have to admit that thoughts like this have acted to hinder me because I start thinking, what if my prayers get answered by my losing my job? I mean, yes, I said I want to do something on my own but that's not how I meant to get started on it!

Then a voice inside told me, O ye of little faith.. And I realized, indeed, what sort of faith in God am I showing by praying but putting restrictions on how those prayers will be answered? Like, please answer my prayer by selecting from one of the following results: And then I go and provide a set of multiple choices for Him from which to choose.

Haha, it doesn't work like that! No, I need to have complete faith that my sincere prayers will be answered in the best way, whether I can imagine what that might be, or not. But that can happen only if I'm willing - and then His will, not my will be done.

Be still, and know that I am God, it says in Psalm 46:10. Or a more relevant translation, Cease striving and know that I am God.

I feel confident that my prayers will be answered, in due time (His, not mine) and in the best way, too, if my faith is unconditional.

So as we begin 2010, I don't want to sound preachy or anything, but that's what I felt I needed to write here in this blog because I know it to be true! I'm putting it in writing for all to see..

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