Monday, June 22, 2009

Dad's Day

It was a nice, relaxing Father's Day. I had lunch with Katie at Twoheys and Greg called in the afternoon. I don't see or hear from them that often so it is always good when I do. As for my dad, we had a lunch celebration with him at Keiro on Saturday. So it was a nice dad's weekend.

When I was little, I think it must have been before I started going to school, my dad worked a swing shift. He'd leave for work around 1 or 2 in the afternoon and I'd be asleep by the time he returned.

Every day when he left I would stand by the front window and wave to him as he backed out of the driveway and he'd wave back as he drove off. That was our ritual.

One day I decided not to wave. There was no reason for it, I just decided not to. My mom asked me, "Aren't you going to wave goodbye to daddy today?" I shrugged and said no, not today. "Why not?" I had no reason. But the more she asked me, being the contrary little fool I was, the more resolved I was not to go to the window and wave.

Well, after that my goodbye wave became more sporadic until finally I just stopped altogether. And by then I felt like I couldn't start waving again because I had already cut it out.

I've always wondered what my dad thought when he looked for me at the window and I wasn't there. I wondered if he felt hurt about that. Now I wonder if that is something he remembers, or if it is something that stayed with him through the years. I've never asked. I think about that every once in a while, but it hasn't come to my mind when I've been with him.

Funny the things that stay with you over the years - waving goodbye, hiding chocolate under the bed..

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